Back to Peace

Last night, or I guess very early this morning, I was sorting through old journals and the different loose leaf inserts stuffed in them.  It was fun finding thoughts and ideas that haven't been developed just yet.  Oh if I had all the time in the world I would really enjoy spending my days writing and painting and dreaming and doodling and thinking and praying... 

Anywho, I also found an old poem/song thingy that I wrote back in October of 2006.  I thought I'd share it with you.  I hope you enjoy it.

BACK TO PEACE

It’s dark and the stars have to fight

to shine their light tonight

and the moon, it’s not in sight.

I’m chilled by a cool breeze

and it’s taking everything in me

not to fall to my knees.

It’s so hard to see when I have nothing to search for.

So hard to dream when I have nothing to reach for.

See my world is one day and one day only.

Until now I never knew being surrounded could be so lonely.

So please dull this pain and let me sleep.

Please bring me back, back to peace.

I can’t make sense of this

and the truth is, the truth is

I’m so pissed.

This is so real it must be fake.

It hurts just to be awake.

I may not fall apart, but I still break.

It’s so hard to move forward when I want the past.

Hard to move at all when I know my strength won’t last.

See my world is one day and one day only.

Until now I never knew being surrounded could be so lonely.

So please dull this pain and let me sleep.

Please bring me back, back to peace.

All I ask for is life, renew it.

Do whatever you have to, please do it.

Doesn’t matter if it’s risky, you can’t ruin it.

You can’t wreck what’s been broken

And you can’t take what’s been stolen.

It may be gone, but I’m still holding—holding on.

It’s so hard to whole when I’m missing a piece.

So hard to be full when I feel so damn empty.

See my world is one day and one day only.

Until now I never knew being surrounded could be so lonely.

So please dull this pain and let me sleep.

Please bring me back, back to peace.

Shift the dark to the side

and bring heaven to life.

Shine it’s light in my eyes.

Please bring me back…

Please bring me back…

Please bring me back, back to peace.

Quoted

Former quote:
“You are full of unshaped dreams...
You are laden with beginnings...
There is hope in you...”

-Lola Ridge-

Current quote: 
"May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness.  I hope you read some fine books, and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful, and don't forget to make some art--write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can.  And I hope somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself."
-Neil Gaiman-

Losing weight and raising money for the Joyful Heart Foundation!

Back in the early weeks of January I began a fitness journey known as the Ultimate Bodyshaping Course, which is a kickboxing, resistance, and nutrition course.  I decided that if I was going to be participating in this ten week long course that I wanted it to benefit more than just me, so I made a goal to raise a minimum of $500 to benefit the Joyful Heart Foundation and help them assist survivors of sexual assault, domestic violence, and child abuse along a journey of their own--a journey to heal mind, body, and spirit.  I've named this project Strong Body/Joyful Heart.

In order to raise funds to support Joyful Heart, I'm asking for individuals to sponsor one week of my fitness journey with a minimum $10 donation.  I'll do my part by adding up the pounds and inches I've lost, doubling it, and donating that amount.  I think that $500 is a very obtainable goal considering the fabulous support system I have.

I've now reached my half-way check point in this journey and today completed my five week fitness evaluation.  I am proud to say that I have lost 18 pounds and 3 3/4 inches in my belly!  Better yet, Strong Body/Joyful Heart has raised $243.50.  I have a long ways to go to get where I want to be, but I'm confident that I can attain my fitness goals because of the progress I've made, the support I have received, and because of the encouragement from my instructors at ATA Black Belt Academy in Minot, ND.  And I wholeheartedly believe that with the generosity of others, Strong Body/Joyful Heart can easily raise $500.

If you can help me along my journey with words of encouragement or a donation, I would be most appreciative!  Please visit my website for more information and to find out how you can help.