"Don't worry dude, MTV gonna pimp your ride!"

I just do not understand the fascination with "tricking out" vehicles unworthy of being pimped. Example: I saw a Pontiac Aztec with rims.

Excuse me, rims on a Pontiac Aztec? Really? Rims don't go with an Aztec at all. That vehicle is made for the "great outdoors." It even has its own little tricks for the camping life and what not, so by no means are rims necessary on a Pontiac Aztec.

Furthermore, just yesterday I cringed--and okay I admit it, I laughed, I'm guilty--when I came across a Ford Focus all done up. The hatchback "Hocus Focus" had extremely tinted windows, the clear light biznass, and a vented sporty hood. But to top it off, a personalized license plate stated the "obvious." It read, "2 PHAT."

Whhhyyyyy? I just don't get it! Why would you spend more money on a Ford Focus then you need to?! That little hatchback should be deemed "unpimpable" and come with the warning of, "DO NOT TRICK OUT." And don't even get me started on people who buy the plastic spinners from Wal.Mart. The only thing that is worse than that are cars with two plastic spinners. At least buy a complete set! Please, I beg you. Oh, and puh-lease do not paint your car sherbet orange. Here's a good rule of thumb, avoid pastel colors all together. And finally, if possible (and this should be possible) steer clear of spoilers that could double as dining room tables.

Okay, maybe I'm being mean. If pimping your "unpimpable" ride makes you happy, well then, good for you. By all means, be happy. But I can seriously think of better ways to spend money, like donating it to charity, stocking your kitchen with groceries, and buying new shoes. The list goes on. And hey, if you want to spend money on your car, why not just fill up your gas tank, change the oil, wash it, tune it up, rotate the tires... That's money well spent.

Desperate Times call for desperate measures...

A few days ago I was finishing my hosting shift at the restaurant I work at around 3:00 p.m. when a woman came to the host stand. She was in her late thirties to early forties, well dressed, and somewhat frantic.

"Hi! I have a flight to catch and this is a really random favor, but all of the airport parking lots are full and I was wondering if maybe someone could help me by coming with me to the airport and then bringing my car back here and then my husband will pick it up later," she said in literally one breath.

I was somewhat taken aback by the desperation hanging in her voice, but I offered to help. "Well, I just finished working so I can go with you," I stated.

"Are you serious? I'll pay you! How much do you want?"

"Oh really, it's not a problem," I replied. And it wasn't. I was indeed done working and the airport was and is maybe a ten minute drive from where I work, so why not help her out? After all, if I were in her position I'd hope that someone would help me out as well.

I told my manager the situation and he gave me a concerned look. "Do you know her?" he asked. I told him that I didn't, but that I could "take her" if need be. I wasn't concerned though because she seemed like a nice woman who was really just in need of spur of the moment random help.

So I followed her to her car, which was a nice Volvo, and got in. She told me her name was Becky and that she was so appreciative of my help. "This is the most random thing I've ever done," she added. I said that I understood that desperate times call for desperate measures and that I was happy to help. She mentioned that she tried to get a cab, but that it was going to be a twenty minute wait--twenty minutes she didn't have to spare as she was off to Chicago for a business trip in which her boss would be picking her up.

During our brief drive we talked about how I was in search of a career, Oprah, and that the parking lots were full because of spring break. As we were nearing the drop off zone Becky's husband called her. He was obviously getting back to her after receiving a panic stricken voice mail. Becky gave him the 411.

"I made a new friend and she is coming with me to the airport and then is taking my car back to the restaurant and then you and Sara need to pick it up later. She'll leave the keys under my seat." She said all of this in, again, literally one breath.

"Are you serious?" he asked somewhat dubiously. Then he said, "Just give her the car. Does she need a car?"

We both laughed and she continued on with her conversation. She noted that she got my name and phone number because she wanted to pay me and said that I was looking for a job, so he should try and help me out. Then she pulled to a stop outside of the airport doors, quickly got out of the car, and flew open the back door pulling out her suitcase. With her cellphone in her left hand and up to her ear and her purse and suitcase in tow in her right hand she thanked me and rushed off to catch her flight. Typical business woman, right?

"Nice to meet you. Have a safe trip!" I said and then climbed into the front seat. I adjusted the seating position and mirrors and slowly drove away, laughing to myself the whole drive. I couldn't believe the amount of trust this woman had. I could have easily drove away with her vehicle!

I was very thankful that I didn't get pulled over or get in a car accident because would I have some explaining to do to the authorities! But the drive was just fine and I parked the car in the restaurant lot and locked the doors with the keys inside as I said I would. The whole experience was random and extremely joyful. Becky was so appreciative and it just really made my day that I could help keep her day rolling as planned. Again, the trust was absolutely awesome and I'm thankful I had the opportunity to help.

It can't be March already, can it?!

Well February certainly came and went, didn't it? Cripes. I only managed one posting? Oh well, I'm sure you (whoever you are) didn't mind. I have my reasons for not posting, however...

First of all, my days have been filled with work. I obtained a serving job at a restaurant in St. Paul. I wish that it was a bit closer to home for my gas guzzling truck's sake and for my wallet's benefit. I also wish that I earned more moolah, which is again for my wallet's benefit. While I'm making wishes here I should inform you that my biggest wish of all is that I had an actual career with an eight to five, Monday through Friday job complete with a nice salary and solid benefits package, paid vacation... Sigh. But even though it's not much, it is a job and I am thankful for that. I also enjoy the opportunity to interact with people. I'm so much more alive when I can make people happy. And though I realize that I can't live for others, for I live only for God, I can live so that others might live a happier life. Yeah, yeah I know that I'm only a waitress, but for the time being I can make the world a better place, one table at a time.

My other excuse for the lack o' blogging is extremely valid for I have not had a working computer for quite some time. My iBook officially died a couple of months ago after a long and hard fought battle. It's really my fault. I loved my iBook, but I tried to make an improvement to it which ended up being a terrible setback that it never fully recovered from. Excuse me, I just need a moment here... Okay, I've composed myself. So after the demise of my computer I turned to my brother's old school clam shell/toilet seat looking iBook. That was working a-ok, but then the battery died after the adapter broke. Thankfully my parents were nice enough to help us out with the purchase of a new battery and adapter; those two parts alone added up to a $250 bill. I'd love a brand spanking new, full loaded iBook, but being I couldn't even afford to foot that bill I'm sticking with sharing my brother's computer. Anyway, since I was without internet there was to be no blogging from me. I was going through withdrawals, but I think that an internet free life has been good for me. I had become too dependent, some might say addicted, to various legal and non-creepy internet activities (i.e. checking my Facebook and email, visiting my favorite sport and celebrity websites, watching random YouTube videos). Now I don't feel the urge to check my email thirty-two times a day. It's a good thing. However, I have been frequenting many car websites in search of an affordable, safe, and fuel efficient/environmentally friendly vehicle.

But I won't get started on that biznass because this is already an extremely long post. I guess I'm just trying to make up for lost time, but by doing that I'm taking up your time! So I'll end here with a "thanks for reading" and "have a fabulous day!"

Description

The man walks about with untied shoes
and wears no jacket in the bitter cold.
He knows the art of punctuation
and what a perfectly placed comma
will do to a person.
Drinks cheap vodka
like it's water,
literally pissing away his money.
He scratches himself
and never combs his hair.
He paints portraits of people
in their true colors as he sees them
and laughs at their reactions to his work.
He doesn't vote
or believe in politics
or even watch the news.
Can't swim or dance,
but still dives into the rhythm of the tide.
He speaks nonsense to please his therapist
and occasionally phones his mother.
Calls me woman,
not girl or young lady,
but woman.

The man is dangerous.

Random Me

Well I haven't posted for a little while, but I can't think of anything poignant to share with the blog world so I am opting to disperse some random information about me. Please don't think I'm self-centered for doing so because I'm really not a narcissistic person, promise. I just truly cannot think of an important topic to discuss. Anyway, on with the randomness...

• My thought process is all over the place. Let me tell you, it's quite the process of how I start at point A and arrive at point B. It's a good thing my friends and family are patient and have a good sense of humor.
• I have diagnosed myself as "slightly O.C.D." For example... All of my frames, knickknacks, and other decorations have to be "just so" (I inherited this trait from my mother); any labels must face forward; and CDs have to be the right side up in their cases. I'm not a "neat freak" when it comes to everything, but there are certain things that I like a certain way.
  
• Because I have extremely curly hair my older brother used to tell people that I stuck my finger in a light socket. This was absolutely hilarious to him when we were kids. Charming, isn't he?
• I can't leave home without chapstick in my pocket. But just in case I do forget to stash it in my pocket I have chapstick stored in my desk, nightstand, makeup bag, purse, and vehicle.
  
• I am very fond of bags of all sorts and wish that I had a Mary Poppins Carpet Bag. You know, like the one where she pulls a lamp out. It would make packing sooo much easier.
  
• I pass out when I donate blood, but I don't mind it too much because that means I get all the free juice and cookies I want. Yesss!
• I always have to have a full glass of water next to my bed at night.
  
• My feet look exactly like my mom's. It's almost eerie.
• My childhood ambition was to become the first woman in the NBA and then in about fifth grade I came up with the WNBA. Of course, it wasn't until 1997 before anyone paid any attention to me.
• I'm not a one word answer kind of gal, in fact I tend to ramble. It runs in the family.
  
• When I was in the first grade I was stepped on by a sheep in the face during my ride in a Mutton Bustin' contest. I took home the glorious first place trophy, however, complete with a golden plastic sheep. The next day at school my best friend asked, "What happened to you? Did you get stepped on by a cow?" Close enough.
• In high school I slept with my basketball. I swear that it helped my shooting touch.
• I'm very much so indecisive. Never ever ask me the following question: "Where should we go out to eat at?"
  
• My claim to fame is that I was referred to as "the artist" in a Page Six article of the New York Post a couple of years ago.