Dear World:
Pay attention because I'm going to officially introduce you to my delightful, hysterical, random, intelligent, silly, witty, and completely lovely Nutter Butter of a Mutter... My mom. My mum. Mi madre. My mother. My mommy. (Drum roll please...) Momma Nanc'. (DA NA NA!)
I've been joyfully writing about her on my Facebook page for quite some time now because, quite simply, she provides me with so much great material. It's hard to keep up with her, really. Her advice is funny and poignant. Her comments candid. Her stories are long and rambling and animated, just like mine. Her shenanigans truly unique. She is a one-of-a-kind, ladies and gentleman, and all together a keeper. But my Facebook status updates no longer do her justice because she is deserving of a wider audience, as opposed to merely my FB BFF's. And truly, a wider audience is deserving of her! I can't keep her all to myself anymore. So I appeal to you, World, and am dedicating a blog label solely to dear, sweet Momma Nanc'. That's right, she gets her very own blog label and I'm sure she is positively thrilled at the prospect of it.
So, without further ado, let's share a story about the now infamous Momma Nanc'...
I have the great pleasure of working with my parents. Clarification: I work for my pops and with my momma, who comes in the afternoons three days a week; I believe her primary job duty is to keep the office entertained and she certainly fulfills that criteria...to say the least.
On this insanely snowy day, I made a coffee run and returned to the office to deliver caffeinated goodness to my boss who was chatting with my mom. My mom said hi to me like nothing was out of the ordinary and I just stared at her with a big grin on my face suppressing a giggle because of a rather large wet spot on her pretty purple argyle sweater. She had spilled coffee, dagnabbit. And to be fair, her spilling isn't out of the ordinary so that would perhaps explain why she was staring at me like nothing was out of the ordinary. Follow? Anywho, she missed a spot of coffee that I pointed out and then went to the sink to wet down her sweater some more and all of a sudden I hear...
"Oh! Oh! What's going on?!"
Somehow she had water cascading down her front all the way to her teeny tiny feet. This is perplexing because the sink is deep and it's just a standard faucet... I don't know how she manages to do half the things she does, God bless her.
My boss helped her out, proclaiming, "Momma Nanc', we can't take you anywhere!" But we are planning on taking her to a local Variety Show tonight and so she'll have to change prior to the performance, which saddened me (I'm being a bit, just a bit dramatic) because I am wearing a purple turtle neck and I jokingly exclaimed, "Aww! Now we won't match!" To which she enthusiastically replied with, "Oh, I'm wearing purple! I'll wear my purple turtle neck!"
Yesss! Now we'll really match.
Well, there you have it folks... Momma Nanc' is da bomb (like tick, tick). Clearly. Be on the lookout for more Momma Nanc' stories. I plan on posting some classics previously shared on my Facebook page and I think I can even find an old blog post where my mom called me and subsequently made my tata's jingle (my own fault) while I was in the middle of an appointment... Yeeeaaaahhhh... That happened.
Cheers!
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